• VitoRobles@lemmy.today
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    6 days ago

    Age 10-20 was miserable. Hormones. Parents. Bullies in high school. Difficult to find work. College struggle and debt.

    Age 20-30 was better but still shit. Welfare. Homelessness. Police harassment. Juggling three jobs to pay rent.

    Age 30-40 was so much better. Life was in order. Wife and I both leveled up our education and got a career. Traveled for the first time (Hawaii then Japan). Had kids.

    Age 40 - life is getting better. Feels like the best days still happening.

  • LazyBaby@lemmy.zip
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    5 days ago

    I really relate to this comic. I didn’t like being a child that much, and I feel alienated a lot on the internet by people constantly wishing they could go back to having no responsibilities. I really, really like being able to control my own destiny and decide what I wanna do, even though it comes with increased pressures and responsibilities.

    • BradleyUffner@lemmy.world
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      5 days ago

      Hell yes to this. Childhood, Highschool, and even in to college were some of the worst years of my life. I never want to repeat them. Sometimes I fantasize about what it would have been like to be “normal”, but I love who I am now and l do not want to give that up or go back.

    • CADmonkey@lemmy.world
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      4 days ago

      Being an adult is awesome. I get to have a motorcycle, my own cat, I can build whatever I want, I can have chickens if I want, and I have a really cute wife. What could I do as a kid? Go to school? Live with my parents? Hang out with people who had the minds of children? Boooring.

  • radix@lemmy.world
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    6 days ago

    20s-30s: Time & energy, but no money.
    60s-70s: Money & time, but no energy.

    40-50s: Not enough of any of them.

  • Mister Neon@lemmy.world
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    6 days ago

    I’m 40. I feel like my life is over. My career was destroyed by Trump and all this AI bullshit. I fear becoming an old man and not being able to afford basic life essentials.

    • lordbritishbusiness@lemmy.world
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      5 days ago

      It’s when you probably have your life in order and are comfortable with who you are. It’s a good time when you are most you.

      Though for those who haven’t got either of those, it’s probably not going to be a good time. I feel for those people, I know a few.

      I’m happy with myself in my 30’s it’s always nice to think of telling my younger self of the stuff I’ve done. British business the younger would be very surprised and absolutely jazzed about it.

  • Skyline969@piefed.ca
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    6 days ago

    This is how it was for me. No societal expectation to care about things anymore. Don’t wanna go somewhere? Say you don’t feel like it or that you’re tired and boom, done. Nobody looks twice at you, which I suppose could feel devastating for some. For me it felt liberating.

  • Couldbealeotard@lemmy.world
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    5 days ago

    Anyone who yearns for their life as child has developmental issues. I’m not trying to say that as a sick burn, I think it’s honestly sad and source of suffering for some people.

    • CADmonkey@lemmy.world
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      4 days ago

      One of the moat depressing things I used to hear as a kid was how this was the best part of my life and I should enjoy it.

  • GhostFace@lemmy.today
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    6 days ago

    Midtwenties and it feels over in a lot of ways. The majority of friends I’ve made growing up or in college are gone. People have spread out and started focusing on their own lives. Even people that I only ever knew online have began moving on.

    In a lot of ways this has been fine because I’ve just turned inward and started focusing on myself too, started being selfish about what I want. I miss seeing a lot of my friends in person rather than random texts or seeing their stories on snap.

    It’s very confusing at times because I enjoy being able to do whatever I want when I want without consulting anyone but I also miss having people to do things with.

    • UltraGiGaGigantic@lemmy.ml
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      6 days ago

      Let people go. You cant hold onto them forever, even in the best of cases. I have people who i consider my best friends that I haven’t seen in years. Maybe never again.

      The river of life has many branches, we just floated down different ones. Dont take it personally.

    • bookie@quokk.au
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      6 days ago

      It’s hard because there seems to be no place to hang out and meet people either. Not for a date, just to chill and make friends.

      • SpacetimeMachine@lemmy.world
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        5 days ago

        One of the last true 3rd places I’ve found is dog parks. If you go consistently at the same time each day you’ll be seeing a lot of the same people, who generally are down to chat. You can talk about their dog to break the ice, and I doubt people would even mind if you don’t have a dog.

      • greedytacothief@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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        5 days ago

        Join a club! Having a group of people you see every week that are happy you’re there is what got me out of my worst depression. I’m in a run club and organize a mountain bike club, but if that’s not your speed there’s lots of others. An improv club/class will probably give you incredible social skills. But there’s roleplay clubs, book clubs, bowling/league night, kickball, knitting, and probably a bunch I can’t think of.

      • mrgoosmoos@lemmy.ca
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        5 days ago

        seconding what the other person said. just go hang out in public places, preferably ones where you can do something and have a natural reason to approach people.

        it isn’t going to happen immediately. but eventually you will strike up conversations with people, and some of those will be good conversations, and some of those will be with people you like, and some of those will be with people who like you. and then you gotta actually get their contact info or plan to meet up again, maybe doing other things.

    • Godric@lemmy.world
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      4 days ago

      Something I really cherish is a scheduled phone call with two of my college buddies, themed on a movie or TV show we agree to watch that week.

      One of us just abruptly made a group chat and asked if we’d be down, and we’ve been doing it for years now, I highly reccomend!

  • stoly@lemmy.world
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    6 days ago

    Very little of my life was worth living until I was in my 30s. It was specifically due to changing societal attitudes towards homosexuality that allowed me to finally live in peace.

  • P1k1e@lemmy.world
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    5 days ago

    I literally found my purpose in my 30s. Nothing was meaningful nor worthwhile in my 20s

    • pyre@lemmy.world
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      4 days ago

      it took me about two years to truly realize i was in my 30s (I’m a bit stupid) but once that happened a massive weight lifted from my shoulders. i suddenly realized, wait, I’m a grown-ass man, i don’t have to deal with this bullshit. i became more confident, took no shit from people and stopped dealing with teenage drama. yes about 10 years too late but that’s when i realized some of the shit i used to entertain didn’t even matter.

      • P1k1e@lemmy.world
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        4 days ago

        Nah man, this is literally how it works. You ever notice how alot of folks who have kids or married someone they shouldn’t have super young feel like they never got out of their 20s? They never had the time to understand their own nature or the nature of the culture around them.

        That social anxiety, the assumed judgment, the paranoia that everyone’s looking for a moment of weakness to exploit… Ya know, the feeling of being an adult who still feels like a teenager.

        Your 30s are where you lose that, or at least I feel like you should. Early, mid, late, whenever. It’s just important that you do

    • Free Trampoline!?@sh.itjust.works
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      6 days ago

      Hey don’t bring your positivity around here, I was just about to feel sorry for myself and blame my misgivings on stuff that isn’t me.

    • [deleted]@piefed.world
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      6 days ago

      Yeah, I have enjoyed all the ages so far for different reasons but it has basically been the same for the last couple of decades other than whatever I have going on at the time. Like getting married, having a kid, changes in work and the rest were all big and important life changing things, but it has been a mix of mostly good and a little bad for almost 5 decades and I’m good with that.

    • Tango@piefed.ca
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      6 days ago

      You should get that taken care of. An occasional twinge now and then is normal, but constant pain? In your thirties? That ain’t standard. In your forties, I could believe - although it still wouldn’t be standard. But your back should still be in relatively good nick in your thirties, unless you lift heavy things for a living. In your thirties a backache should be nothing a good night’s sleep, a nice stretch, and a long leisurely walk can’t fix.

      Unless… you DO lift with your knees, right? When you need to lift something? And keep your back straight and chin up while doing so? People don’t constantly say to do that just for shits and giggles - it’s universally good advice.

      • greedytacothief@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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        5 days ago

        Why are you getting down voted? Muscle pains are usually due to weak muscles. Obviously there’s other things it could be, but YouTube and planet fitness are cheaper than the doctors.

  • huey_m@piefed.social
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    6 days ago

    My bet on why people don’t identify with that anymore is shifting social expectations and economy leading to having kids way later than in their day.

    Which… I love my kids, wouldn’t trade 'em for anything. But they can definitely make you feel old both by just watching them age and the extra responsibility reducing the freedom/spontaneity you might have had more of earlier in your youth. If you had kids in your early 20s, this starts earlier. If you don’t start until your 30s, you’re probably already starting to settle a bit anyway just from being more established in a career and such.

    I’d also be curious to know rates of messing around with harder drugs and drinking and such. My sense is those have gone down, and that kind of thing can be hard on your body.

    Just spit balling here.

    • Dozzi92@lemmy.world
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      5 days ago

      I like to think I did my 20s right, if that means anything. Partied often, built my career, worked on my established, longstanding friendships. I lived a bit wildly, but I also think that I gradually wound those things down. I have been in my career since I was 20, but in my mid-20s, my friends would show up to my jobs at night, I’d change out of my suit in the bathroom, and we’d all take a train into Manhattan, on a Tuesday or Wednesday. It’s something I couldn’t even consider. Our nights started at 1030, 11. Now, that’s essentially when they end for me.

      I’m now in as late as your 30s get, have kids, and that lifestyle is a very distant past, which I’m happy about. I have friends who still like to live it, and that’s cool. I’ll hang out with them, but I also have no problem tapping out early, and they also don’t care that I do. We’re all past the point of “uno mas,” which is funny because it’s been the name of our group chat for the past 15 years, and it’s okay. I had fun, it’s no longer what I want to do for fun, and that’s cool with me and everyone.

      It’s nice to all grow to a point where peer pressure has seemed to finally met it’s demise, although I do always say peer pressure is a great motivator of youth, and I wouldn’t change my youth for a second, because my present is great.