By modern western standards, all Chinese mothers are bad mothers 😭😭😭

(my point is, it’s not her fault, China made her this way, I blame China for this)

Funny enough, hydroxyzine is supposed to be for for anxiety but also for sleep

But all I get is feeling tired, not really anxiety relief…

No idea…

Mom seemed to manage well and kept my family afloat… and she just lashes out on everyone… sometimes threatening divorce with dad, sometimes lash out at my older brother, sometimes at me… :/

So I guess by being alert enough means losing sanity and hurting the ones you’re supposed to protect…

:(

(still love mom tho… idk why… oxytocin is weird)

Holy shit, New u/GrimReaper Obsession, Just Dropped!

Instead of Age Gaps and superheroes, its canals and drowning…

🤣

Mirai Nikki 👀

(That Anime was weird ngl… the dude getting locked away from his friends thing… and the whole cage thing at the home… and the corpses… idk wtf I watched tbh)

Can I have magic that fixes non-romantic relationships like sibling relations or like parent-child relations or like just friendships?

Can I have magic that make every country like each other and end all human conflicts?

Mainstream… Something you hear about a lot and you can walk down the street and chances are, someone will be on it.

Social media… I mean anything that you can do social things as a main fuction of it…

So game chats are excluded since games are the primary function.

Damn I hate to think about the eventual day that mom dies…

I sometimes wanna reverse time and be her child again…

Perhaps I could be a less shitty child we’d have more wholesome moments…

Reminds me of Wheel of Time

Something like “shall speak no word that which is not true” is one of the 3 oaths… but they can still deceive without technically lying…

Bruh I got fingerprinted and it’s probably in a FBI database for a stupid school fight and I was a minor at the time. And there was no conviction. It didn’t matter regardless.

Welcome to the world. Its full of bullshit.

Oh btw if you’re an adult and wanna immigrate to another country, you’re gonna have tl give them your fingerprints and probably even a 3d face scan nowadays (probably even DNA tests in the future).

Inb4 they outlaw meshtastic

Is your name a TrageDeliah or something?

But as someone with a Chinese Name in an English-Speaking country, I do feel very weird when someone calls my name…

They’ll never get the real version of the name, only an Anglicanized version of it.

It feels weird, like it feels kinda like a name that only Chinese people are supposed to call me, having a non-Chinese say that name feels like if a teacher called you those nicknames only your family members are supposed calls you by…

I never feel weird saying someone elses name. Like wut bruh?

But yea I get it, the phone call giving their name is very weird to me… like c’mon you’re supposed to be a faceless nameless person who I talk to for 10 minutes lol

Even in person customer service is still weird unless you’re more long term… like I’m a client or something… like real estate agent or car sales person

Not fucking customer service or a fastfood, dont wanna know your name and I don’t like giving out mine either

I don’t think its inherently “AI”, its more of the boilerplate “your life matters, people do care, sEeK hElP, jUsT cAlL 998 bRo”

Like… c’mon, so overused and cliche

Its supposed to be “AI”, why not say something new and useful jesus christ, they act like those “therapists” that say the same “oH wE rEaLlY cArE aBoUt yOu” shit that makes you feel like just reduced to a number in their system, and feel even more suicidal

omg its depression turtle 🫠

You can um… doomscroll youtube and listen to anti-government music to make you feel better… 🤷‍♂️

And enjoy whatever freedoms that still remains while it lasts… 👀

I mean the clinical type.

Makes me feel worse than before…

“Talk Therapy” is a waste of time

I tried Lexapro and Welbutrin now… eh idk all I felt was the placebo effect of “OMG Is this gonna save me?”

But then the novelty dies off and idk if its even doing anything and it takes too long and I just drift off it and not really stick to schedule…

I mean its not like he’s gonna live there.

Plan is to get married then do the usual marriage greencard visa route and then start a family in the US… and to them its just bussiness as usual, (they’re not even worried about trump the slightest… 👀)

My family was originally from China, now we’re in the US, most of my family are US Citizens.

I don’t think they like the idea of interracial (or even inter-ethnic) marriage… 1st generation tends to want to marry within their own ethnicity.

(piefed.ca is just a random instance I picked… I tend to avoid US-Servers for political reasons ahem cuz you know)

Spare time… maybe

Spare energy? Zero.

I need some of this. My house has cockroaches everywhere… been like this for years… 😭

Why is my family so ghetto lol

Literally everything we do is so “poor people things” (and we’re not even that poor, just horder-y and frugal-y)