It is also a very big thing to demand of young and unexperienced men to be vocal about their desires, because men are also being conditioned to have only a few states - stoic, angry or horny. So we are on pretty even ground here, because admitting that last part is not that easy if you are a decent guy and respect your partner. And if that man is worth a shit, he will respect you and not just want to fuck you every waking moment, while also having other interests that are a very healthy thing to have.
Demanding that people do their part in a relationship and voicing what they need to feel appreciated is not a big ask, it is the basis of any relationship. Demanding that a partner drops whatever they are currently doing because you feel horny might be ok or might be rebuffed, and both are valid answers and have to be respected. But the important part here is that YOU ASK, and not air the dirty laundry on social media instead because you were not capable of initiating a dialogue with your partner.
Yup. Completely agreed.
Romantic relationships have a strong tendency to be very dysfunctional precisely because of this. It’s made worse by most girls not knowing how limited a guy’s emotional repertoire is required to be, and most guys not knowing how strongly the society is conditioning girls to mute their desires.
And for this, that you ask for, to be possible some day, we really must do better!
Current society is pushing all genders too much into stereotypes, and it is harmful to all of us, i am with you on this one. I am GenX, and i am keenly aware about what society wanted me to be - a man with a very limited amount of possible emotional expression. I am lucky that i escaped that rigid framework because of the people i met in my life.
The current patriarchy is harmful to all of us. Men are reduced to a few basic emotional responses, while women are muted alltogether.
These things can only improve through open and honest discourse between genders (which luckily is happening! Not everywhere and equally distributed, but it is occurring) to make all genders aware that the most important thing is being open about what they need and how to fulfill it. That is really the basis of any stable relationship.
It is also a very big thing to demand of young and unexperienced men to be vocal about their desires, because men are also being conditioned to have only a few states - stoic, angry or horny. So we are on pretty even ground here, because admitting that last part is not that easy if you are a decent guy and respect your partner. And if that man is worth a shit, he will respect you and not just want to fuck you every waking moment, while also having other interests that are a very healthy thing to have.
Demanding that people do their part in a relationship and voicing what they need to feel appreciated is not a big ask, it is the basis of any relationship. Demanding that a partner drops whatever they are currently doing because you feel horny might be ok or might be rebuffed, and both are valid answers and have to be respected. But the important part here is that YOU ASK, and not air the dirty laundry on social media instead because you were not capable of initiating a dialogue with your partner.
Yup. Completely agreed.
Romantic relationships have a strong tendency to be very dysfunctional precisely because of this. It’s made worse by most girls not knowing how limited a guy’s emotional repertoire is required to be, and most guys not knowing how strongly the society is conditioning girls to mute their desires.
And for this, that you ask for, to be possible some day, we really must do better!
Current society is pushing all genders too much into stereotypes, and it is harmful to all of us, i am with you on this one. I am GenX, and i am keenly aware about what society wanted me to be - a man with a very limited amount of possible emotional expression. I am lucky that i escaped that rigid framework because of the people i met in my life.
The current patriarchy is harmful to all of us. Men are reduced to a few basic emotional responses, while women are muted alltogether.
These things can only improve through open and honest discourse between genders (which luckily is happening! Not everywhere and equally distributed, but it is occurring) to make all genders aware that the most important thing is being open about what they need and how to fulfill it. That is really the basis of any stable relationship.