It’s just, too much, so much bad and evil happening and I can’t take it, nor can I look away.
I use these platforms to distract from the gnawing constant loneliness I feel that never goes away.
I can’t spend more than 5 minutes without a video playing or checking some kind of media to fill the void.
I’m feeling so suicidal nowadays, but I’m stuck in this existence for the time being.
Have you considered art? Try drawing or painting. Entry level stuff is dirt cheap and creative endeavors are a great way to get all the ick out of your brain.
Edit: or writing? Perhaps poetry, maybe try to write a song or a story, or a song that tells a story.