“If at first you don’t succeed, try again.” “Winners never quit and quitters never win.”
Our culture has a lot of sayings against quitting, making it seem like a failure. But sometimes, abandoning a goal means opening up space for something better.
By NPR.
The advice also doesn’t feel super useful to me with ADHD. I’ve quit degrees and jobs on a whim. I could use advice on how to finish something for fucking once lol
I sympathize! Could an accountability buddy help?
The advice is that you have to.
Dramatically stated: You have to or you are going to die.
(Disclaimer: Not from this, probably, but eventually. And if you don’t do this, by the time you die, then you won’t have done it. You’ll have missed the opportunity.)
Your body doesn’t make dopamine the way neurotypical bodies do. You won’t get satisfaction from the usual motivators. Create your own satisfaction by taking the time to think about how doing something will increase satisfaction. Give it at least 20 seconds. The taps on the neurotransmitters take a bit to warm up. Maybe take a few moments to savor the same thing at different times to reinforce and remind yourself why doing things is worth it.
Focus on what’s achievable, and what small actions you can take to get there. Don’t get mired in thought, but instead give your effort to the actions you can take. Don’t compare your progress to others.
I also often “Forrest Gump” myself through things when it starts to feel like a slog. ‘I’ve come this far. I might as well keep going.’
This is easier for things that have an endpoint, like a degree or long project. You can’t unwind time that you’ve spent on something, but can waste that time by not finishing. Not finishing offers way less dopamine than finishing.