Last time I used Nair was over a decade ago and it was impressively, dreadfully smelly. Like burning hair, but more chemically. Just be prepared.

They might not even be pervs, maybe they’re autistic and feet are their special interest.

Also autistic. Seconding that this is hilarious. I’m with the reporter, the prisoner makes prison sound like a good place to be.

I stacked paperback books as a toddler, straight in a line. My dad taught me to do them in a brick pattern for stability.

Yep. Good news on that front: libraries I’ve worked at just don’t keep records of what you’ve checked out after you’ve returned it, unless there was some sort of fine or something. Can’t give up data you don’t have and if the library avoids storing the data for anyone then it’s hard to accuse the library of selectively hiding data.