I can understand how actual crafts enthusiasts would be offput by the change. Although, I will say…I kinda want to watch the videos about gluing hooks to your forehead and hanging coats. I’m imaging it SNL style. A husband and wife open the door to greet the couple they are going to host for the evening. And as they take their friends coats, they open the closet door, and there’s just a guy in the closet with hooks glued on his face. And they just hang their couples coats, while their friends just look on like “…what?”. And then, they do a tutorial on how to glue hooks to your face, so you can freak out your friend’s friends. You don’t have to be naked in the closet, but…it certainly is a route you could take if it’s that kind of a party! The tutorial would be done by Martha Stewart, in a very serious tone…but she’s just hot gluing hooks to a bunch of 20 year old stoners faces.

And then Martha Stewart could be like “When I hot glue some pretty boys faces, sometimes the glue gun burns their young little faces. It’s a good thing.” As it cuts to her absolutely intentionally burning some guys face with the metal tip of the glue gun while laughing maniacally.

I’d watch that show.

Psssshhhhhh, not according to the news cycles.

And then theres me…using hot sauce as lube.

It’s news to me. I haven’t clicked the video, and have no idea what 5 minute crafts is. I now know it’s a scam, but still have no idea what we’re talking about…

“What if…I haven’t knocked enough shit off the counter? I did a lot, but maybe I could do more. How much is enough? How will I ever know if I’m living up to my full potential? How much is ENOUGH??? Maybe too much is never enough…am I doomed to be nothing more than a has been? Or am I a never was?”

“Awwww, kitty looks cute today!”

“SHUT UP JOHN!!! I’M ALWAYS CUTE, BITCH!”

Oh shit! I always just thought I was weird. Nope! Turns out I’m just a Xennial. 83’ represent!

But…but…but…

No no no…they want brains. Don’t you know basic horror movie survival???

Anyways, shoot them in the brains

Where does Rob Zombie fall into all of this?

I mean…yeah. I guess that IS pretty on brand here…

Damn! I’m impressed! Way to committ to the character.

crying Dwayne Johnson noises ensue

Bells Palsy, maybe?

Oooooooh, a payday! I like peanuts!

No you won’t. Maybe a trial size…maybe…

Which model toughbook?

Dogs are trainable. Humans are stupid.

Cats are weird. One time I couldn’t find my two cats.

Turns out they were in the trash can, and taking a nap.

So I dumped wet cold spaghetti in the trash.

Never found them in the trash again.

Deleted by creator??? THIS ENTIRE THREAD WAS TAILOR MADE FOR YOUR EXACT USERNAME, AND YOU CHICKEN OUT???

Psssshhhhhh!!! Silly child. The world can take anything the humans can dish out. And if the world decides there needs to be another extinction level ice age, or another life ending meteor strike, so be it.

The world can take our best punch and no-sell it. Then respond with ending our lives. The world will be fine, and last billions more years. The humans on the other hand are like chihuahuas. Loud, mouthy, pushy, aggressive, but totally vunerable. Even if they’re too stupid to realize it.

Just ask the T-Rex what happens when you get mouthy. Oh wait, you can’t. They’re all dead.

I’m sorry…did you just use FOX NEWS as your source, in what is supposed to be a legitimate news community??? Take this post over to the shitposts section!